i like online shopping and putting everything i want in a cart then checking my subtotal and laughing and closing the tab
do atheists say oh my god
yep. we say it any time we hear something that’s unbelievable.
go into starbucks and ask them to write your url on the cup so when they shout it out you get a coffee and a free promo
my dick has a lot in common with the sun
nobody likes looking directly at it?
It gives people cancer?
woAh woah woah
It rises at the crack of dawn?
it disappears at night?
direct exposure often leads to a nasty case of sunburn?
it needs to stay approximately 92,960,000 miles away from me?
nobody will ever touch it?
if you don’t vividly remember the civil war you’re too young for tumblr please deactivate now